I once was lost...

God is teaching me so much right now.
Almost too much... or I think its too much. I am not a quitter. But I have come to realize that when too much is going on, or there are too many lessons being poured into me at once or too many things to pray for... that it has become easier to just tune it out. Take notes and 'hear' it but not listen to it. Of course I look at this as a competitor and call myself a quitter. That I am not willing to press on- to persevere. I try to think about all the things He is teaching me... thinking that I must organize the lessons I am learning and write out the prayers I have... but that doesn't seem like a relationship. That seems like school work.
How am I approaching what the Lord is teaching me?
I love being fed... through multiple weekly ministries... through multiple women and men in my life that pour into me. I'm not sure if I allow God to teach me as much as I allow His people to teach me... or if I count it as the same.
I know right now that God is teaching me a lot about where I came from. A lot about the lost girl I once was. Showing me that I am still such a sinner, but that through Christ I am forgiven.
I feel discouraged. I feel alone. I feel overwhelmed. I feel like I shouldn't be having a public pity party... but then again it is probably good for me to be a tad vulnerable.
I think I will go make a list... my ultimate earthly therapy.