A reading from the book of Alicia.

I was going through my journal today and came across some very interesting excerpts.

An entry from 12-30-2007 (My journal is blue with the word Believe on it- ironically I was not walking with God when I began...)

---So I recently moved and found this journal. Ironic because I'd say one of my biggest weaknesses is believing, trusting and just plain faith. For some reason I can believe/trust someone I hardly know, but someone close to me and even with myself- it gets a little more complicated.
I have lots of dreams. I dream of my career, husband, wedding, children- just my future. I've been titled high maintenance once or twice (OR A LOT) and I've realized that I am this way for myself. I am high maintenance because I deserve the best. Because I believe my Dad, Mom and sister when they tell me I can do anything I want. So I expect to. And fully intend to. Its time to take control over everything in my life- not just the easy parts.
A new year is upon us and as usual I have a ton of plans/goals/dreams. More than anything, I want to have it all together.---

Little did I know how my world would be rocked in 2008. Phew! What a year it was! My attitude is so funny...so much my past... so in control... so confident. I was ready to hold the world in my hands. Luckily, the Lord broke me... and I am so thankful for that.

Here is an entry from 11-24-2008

---Dear God,
Today they are speaking of shattered dreams in my devotional. I am so thankful that it is so hard for me to come up 2 or 3. Mike may have broke my heart, but I honestly don't know if I would have ever come back to you, had our relationship ensued. My parents divorced when I was 6, I can't truly say that broke my heart. My grandma Louise and great grandma Mackey passed away buy they were in pain and ill, so I know it was better off. I have experienced a lot of trials, but I would never think that i have had impeccable sufferings. My blood disease psoriasis has been extremely...bothersome- but I am alive and able to live a normal life. My family and friends are heatlhy and there for me. And the only really bad things in my life right now, I am slowly getting rid of. I am leaving the house with Brooke and Brittanee; Outback is scheduling me less and I am still surviving. I have an office and great roommates. Lord, thank you for not shattering me and allowing me to see the good in my past situations. Thank you for answering my prayers- either the way I preferred or not. Thank you for constantly changing my heart, teaching me and being so evident in my life. You are so good to me. Help me to be a better witness to your name, to be a better friend and family member and partner. Keep teaching me and reminding me that I am a work in progress. Thank you for your will and having a far better plan than I could ever imagine- let me live it!---

I love looking back and seeing how God has answered my prayers, matured my faith, deepened my knowledge and strengthened my relationship with Him. I am definitely a work in progress...