Craving Jesus

Tonight was my first night attended Crave. Crave is the high school youth group at Summit Church. For some time now, I have been trying to figure out what to do with my Tuesday nights. I was going to Crew so many times a week and realized I wasn't doing much to pour into others. I tried Ignite, I babysat a lot, considered Young Life... but didn't hear anything from God. I waited and waited... and didn't commit (which is strange for me). Finally, I was talking to April (my wonderfully young mentor) and complaining about wanting to give up BigEnuf and KidZone but that I felt like I wasn't doing anything else for others... she recommeded me to try Ignite or Crave and work with younger girls who would look up to me. I thought about Ignite, but honestly wasn't too pumped about serving there / didn't feel like I was 'qualified' enough. I started getting really excited about Crave after I emailed the youth pastor who told me there was a need for a 10th grade small group leader. A woman at the church, Desiree called me a few days later telling me a funny story about her daughter, Tessa, wanting me to be her small group leader awhile ago... which is pretty weird because I wasn't even thinking about it then! Tessa is an awesome girl and I am excited to get to know her and her friends better!
Tonight we learned about prayer and the importance of it. The small group discussion wasn't too organic...but I will pray that it gets easier and better with time. These girls are sharp too! One of them started asking me a question about the Old Testament and I totally didn't have the answer and Tessa spoke up and answered (I am pretty sure it went undetected). During the message I thought about where I was when I was their age in high school. Man, I was lost. I started to tear up thinking that some of these students are where I was. I went to church and youth group but I still chose to make horrible decisions.
Lord I pray that I can make a difference in the lives of these girls in my small group and others within Crave. I pray that you would use me to be an intentional part of their lives and that their hearts and eyes would be open to your love. Stir in the hearts of the students that don't know you and prepare the leaders that are pouring into the lives of those there. Take away my own will and my words, I pray that you would only allow me to speak your Truth and that you lead me all the way through.